Are We Doing It Wrong?

This debt journey started for, and has helped incredibly with, a different journey altogether. I was in desperate need of a rebound year. A year where I focused on myself more than I typically do. I was getting to a point in my life where momentum was taking me in the wrong direction. I was depressed. I was negative. I wasn't physically healthy. All while working as a "wellness coach", which inflated the negative feelings surrounding these things.

I'm mostly an introvert. An observer. I've learned a new term recently, and believe it applies to me - a trait known as "hyper-feelers", meaning if you and I are having a deep conversation, I'm likely to take some of that emotion/energy along with me for a while. Positive or negative. Sometimes a long while.

And I work with people. A LOT of people.

While I'm personally pulling myself back in the right direction, my personality remains the same and I still work with a lot of people. I can't help but think that what I'm observing in my own lifestyle (past and present), in the lives of the many people that I talk to on a regular basis, and the many statistics I see regularly, that there is something we, as a collective, are seemingly doing "wrong".

The following statistics that I'm about to share are not done so in judgement. It's a collection of things I see regularly while working on my personal goals, and working in wellness. As an observer, I'm fascinated and slightly worried about these things. Human behavior is driven, to varying degrees, by the environment we are living in. Our culture. Right now, it's hard not to see these statistics and not be of the opinion that our culture needs a healthy change. I personally believe we passively enable each other. How many of you witness a loved one struggling with a certain issue, but also see that person continuing behaviors that are making their issue worse? I will say this before I get to the statistics - I wish someone close to me sat me down while I was in my funk and asked me when I was going to take action. I needed someone to tell me to stop bitching and to start reversing my direction one step at a time. It took me roughly 3 years to start reversing my habits and mindset in a significant way.

Let's get to the statistics.

• Since 2008, the highest percentage of those polled that said there were "happy" in a given year was only 35% according to this poll. 
• The United States spends $10,348 per person per year on healthcare. That's $2400 more than the second country on this list, and almost double that of any other country on this list. Yet...
• With all that money spent the US ranks 45th when comparing life expectancy.
• It costs, on average, $18,764 for a family to have health insurance in America (cost is split between family and employer - I pay $8500 currently). The poverty level for a family of 4 is $25,000. 
• Obesity is rising, with 36.5% of Americans falling in to this category.
• As sick as we are physically, suicide is still in the top 10 causes of death in America. An often shared statistic is a veteran commits suicide every 22 minutes in America. In the book Tribe by Sebastian Junger, the author theorized and attributed this to the lack of community feel in America, and the drive for exceptionalism. The military, especially while serving overseas, provides a brotherhood and camaraderie for soldiers. They have a hard time assimilating to the traditional American culture after they're done serving. I tend to agree with this theory, and I believe this to be the case for many in America, soldier or civilian.
• American exceptionalism...after asking 2,000 American's to define what it means to "make it", the consensus was = to earn $147k per year ($90k more than the average American makes), over a 31 hour work week (3 hours less than average). You'd travel 3 times per year, live in a $461k house, and drive a $41k vehicle. 
• According to statistics, 8.1% of Americans reported experiencing depression over a two week period between the years of 2013-2016. However, in 2014, statistics showed that 1 in 8 Americans were taking an antidepressant medication. A 65% rise since the turn of the century.
• Loneliness, at a time of extreme online connectedness, is being questioned as a health epidemic. Social disconnectedness may be a more useful term in my opinion.
• Total household debt hit a record high at the end of 2017. $13.15 trillion. For five consecutive years, mortgage, student, auto, and credit card debts increased.

I see it around me all the time. I am guilty myself. Our culture is "busy", and we wear that slogan like a badge of honor. Our expectations as humans, parents, spouses, friends, etc. are probably unrealistic. We seek perfectionism and exceptionalism, and have poor coping mechanisms to deal with the "failure" felt, and exhaustion in reaching, these lofty goals. On the flip side, in the middle of typing this, I realize and acknowledge a lot of great things have been born out of this type of culture. But it seemingly comes at a cost.

In closing, I'm thankful to live in a country that affords me the ability to choose whether I'd like to run with the rats in the race, or find a quieter path. I seek the latter. I hope everyone can at least pause for a moment and decide what it is that makes them happy.